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8月10日 Town wants $384,000 for pee by the seaWed Aug 2, 2006 9:25am ET DUBLIN (Reuters) - A ramshackle public toilet could fetch 300,000 euros ($384,000) -- the price of a new house -- if politicians in western Ireland get their way. The town of Lahinch reckons property-hungry buyers will snap up the dilapidated, out-of-order toilet because of its great location -- a surfing beach on Ireland's rugged Atlantic coast. "You could leave the toilet block and be in the sea in less than 40 seconds," local politician Martin Conway told Reuters, but admitted: "It's quite remarkable that an old toilet block would fetch 300,000 euros." The average cost of a home in Ireland, where house prices have gone up 15 percent in the past year, is 299,929 euros.
Local property auctioneer Nicola Leyden said the site, overlooking Ireland's best known surfing spot, was breathtaking: "It's probably the most sought after pee you'll ever take on the west coast of Ireland." © Reuters 2006. All Rights Reserved.
Come on now, you have to admit that this is just funny..... That's Not Brand
Whoo Hoo!! So I started a new job, finally after over a year of unemployment. It took me a while to get here, but I'm proud to say that I did it. How's it going you ask??? Well, it's ok so far. I probably started at one of the worst times, not including Christmas, as this past weekened was tax free. Eeesh what a freakin nightmare!! Sunday, I don't even really wanna talk about Sunday, but alas I will.... Sunday was my first day all on my little lonesome, without the guidance of my trainer. Eeek, it was truly my own personal nightmare. I was probably given one of the hardest zones in the store that day-Boys and Girls. Tax free weekened and back to school sales = Me Losing My Freakin Mind.... The entire day I felt completley overwhelmed, frenzied, frustuated, angry, and at the edge of breaking down. By 11:30, I was seriously ready to quit, or fall down in a pile of fried nerves and tears. Alas everything worked out in the end, and I managed to make it through my first single day at Target. Here's hoping the days to come will be better.... 8月9日 How not to open a grenade...Wed Aug 9, 2006 7:36am ET
 RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil (Reuters) - A Brazilian man died Tuesday when he tried to open what police believe was a rocket-propelled grenade with a sledgehammer in a mechanical workshop on the outskirts of Rio de Janeiro.
Another man who was in the workshop at the time of the explosion was rushed to a hospital with severe burns, a police officer told Reuters. The workshop was destroyed and several cars parked outside caught fire. Police found several unexploded army issue rocket-propelled grenades in the workshop. They believe the ammunition had been brought there by scavengers wanting to sell them as scrap metal, but they also are investigating a possible link to Rio's heavily armed drug gangs who often raid military bases. © Reuters 2006. All Rights Reserved.
Alrighty then...what can I really say about this little gem of a story??? It's honestly hard for me believe that there are people this clueless living among us in this world. When I really think about it, I have to admit it's a little scary. Imagine if that was your neighbor!!! I mean how much brain power does it really take to figure out that pounding on old grenades is NOT A GOOD IDEA!? I guess some people just didn't get that old common sense gene during the creation process eh?? 3月17日 Holidays
A great big Happy Birthday to my grandmother or "grannie" !! It's awsome having you here and I love you sooo much!!!
And also Happy ST. Patricks Day!!
I'll try to post something soon folks, so I hope some of you will pop back in when I do!! Hope everyone is doing well and I'll talk to you later!! 2月22日 Bit O' The Onion for ya....Quote: The Onion: America's Finest News Sourcehttp://www.theonion.com/White House Had Prior Knowledge Of Cheney ThreatAug. 2005 Briefing Warned, 'Cheney Determined To Shoot Old Man In Face' WASHINGTON, DC—Government documents declassified today reveal that President Bush was briefed last summer of "a substantial risk" that Vice President Dick Cheney would shoot an elderly male in the face sometime in the next several months.
In a Presidential Daily Briefing given to Bush in August 2005, the CIA warned that the vice president was a potent threat to the senior population at large, and in particular "possessed the capabilities and intentions to spray a senior citizen with projectiles fired from a shotgun or other weapon." A second brief identified the population at risk as those "between 70 and 80 years of age," and warned that the vice president posed the greatest threat to "seniors in close proximity to the vice president when he is armed." The brief, which urged the White House to take "the most thorough possible precautions to disable this threat to the faces, necks, and chests of the nation's elderly," was issued a full six months before the events of Feb. 11. The emergence of the document is causing many to question whether Bush and his staff adequately understood or appreciated the the risk posed by Cheney. "To learn that the president's own people advised him in advance of the strong likelihood that Cheney might spray a helpless geriatric victim with bird shot, and still he did nothing, brings to light very serious concerns about this administration's Cheney-containment policies," said Victor Steinberg, director of the Froman Institute, a D.C.-based organization that monitors vice-presidential violence. Further investigation revealed that reports of potential Cheney violence have surfaced since the early '90s, but were given higher priority in the Clinton Administration. In January 2001, outgoing Clinton Administration officials made specific warnings to Colin Powell, emphasizing the vice-presidential threat. In a statement released Monday, White House press secretary Scott McClellan pointed to the number of times that random Cheney attacks have been prevented or stopped by the administration. "The president routinely deals with any number of reports concerning the vice president's assaults on our nation's elderly, such as ear-biting, clubbing, or in one case, the hurtling of a photocopier," McClellan said. "In each case, the president has seen that appropriate steps are taken, whether that means close monitoring of the vice president, adjustments in his medication, or the removal of heavy equipment from his offices, to ensure the safety of those around him." "We assure you that protecting senior citizens from vice-presidential shotgun blasts was, is, and will remain the highest priority of this administration," he added. Tag! Your It!Ok, so Manda tagged me. Now I have to confess to 5 strange habits, and tag 5 other unsuspecting "victims"
 Now I will say that I do suffer from OCD, and so almost all my strange habits are born out of this.
1. I make strange clicking noises with tongue. Mostly when I'm either by myself, or with my family.
2. I have to rinse my mouth out a total of 4 times when I brush my teeth.
3. I never tell my parents goodbye. I always say love you.
4. I use ketchup on almost everything I eat.
5. I often drift off into discussion with myself anytime I read, see, or hear something that peaks my interest. (Yes these little conversations can last for up to an hour at least. No, I'm not entirely convinced yet that I'm completely bonkers.
 ) 2月19日 Actual Clippings From Church Bulletins
Hey, Idiot Hey, Idiot! Chronicles of Human Stupidity by Leland Gregory
John Q. Idiot:
CSX railroad police watched as a thirty-year-old Nashville, Tennesse, man placed a twenty-foot ladder across two different train tracks and waited for a train to come along. The police removed the ladder before a calamity could happen and promptly arrested teh man. When asked why he had put the ladder across the tracks in the first place, the man explained that he had stolen the ladder and found it too cumbersome, so he put it on the tracks in hopes a train would come by and make two ten-foot ladders out of it. He was sentenced to six months in jail--or another way of looking at it is that he was sentenced to one-half of a one-year sentence.
An Elkhart, Indian, man has been charged with armed bank robbery, using a firearm during the course of a violent crime, and felony violations. The charges don't seem out the ordinary until you realize the man was the founder of the city's gun buy-back program, Drop Your Guns.
A forty-three-year-old man from Richmond, Virginia, was hospitalized after being blown off the top of a van traveling fifty miles per hour. Authorities said the man had been lying on top of the van holding down a bundle of wooden fencing when a gust of wind blew him off.
Wanted: Somebody to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. You'll get paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons. Safety not guarenteed. I have only done this once before.
--Actual want add from the Oakview (California) Gazette
A man on a water scooter on Lake Michigan was missing for two days when Coast Guard personnel finally located him on his scooter suffering from sunstroke and dehydration. The man hadn't had any water for two days, confusing the Coast Guard becuase Lake Michigan is a freshwater lake.
 2月17日 Open-minds please!Last night on the Daily Show I saw something that added to my mind's inability to turn off at night. It was a clip for a movie called Valley of the Wolves-Iraq. I don't know how many of you out there have heard about it, so I shall offer you a summary of what the movie is about. I've taken this article from the Internation Herald Tribune: Europe :
The crowd cheered, clapped and whistled as the Turkish agent plunged the knife into the chest of the enemy commander.
"Valley of the Wolves - Iraq," which opened last week in movie theaters in Turkey, Austria and Germany, is a Rambo-like action story involving, in this case, Turkish gunmen who seek revenge against a tyrannical occupying army. But in this version, the most expensive movie ever made in Turkey, the enemy is no oppressive third-world dictatorship. The commander's name is "Sam" - as in Uncle - and the opposing forces are Americans, who are being punished for offenses against Turkish as well as Iraqi pride and honor. Sam William Marshall, played by Billy Zane, is portrayed as a sociopath, killing people without a second thought and claiming that he is doing God's will, a thinly veiled reference to statements by President George W. Bush about America's "crusade" for democracy in Iraq and the Middle East. Indeed, while fictional, some of the movie is based on real events. The opening sequence portrays an incident that made headlines in 2003, when a group of Turkish special forces soldiers in Iraq was taken into custody by American marines. The Turks, mistaken for insurgents, were handcuffed and held with hoods over their heads. The incident angered many Turks. Other scenes show ruthless marines killing Iraqis and soldiers mistreating inmates at Abu Ghraib prison. A Jewish-American doctor, played by Gary Busey, is shown as shipping inmates' organs to New York, London and Israel. All these, according to the screenwriter, Bahadir Ozdener, were inspired by real events. Zane said he was not bothered by the movie's anti-American tone, adding that the horrors of war should be exposed. "I acted in this movie because I'm a pacifist," he said in a televised interview. "I'm against all kinds of war." Whatever its artistic merits, the movie, which has already broken Turkish box office records, has highlighted a growing discrepancy in how America is seen in Turkey. Officially, the two governments have been enjoying much-improved relations after a low point in 2003, when Turkey refused to allow American troops to cross the country to invade Iraq. On the street, however, public opinion of America has been steadily declining since the invasion of Iraq, the revelations about the abuse at Abu Ghraib and the suspected transferring of Al Qaeda suspects to foreign countries to be tortured in secret prisons. Yet since the invasion, Turkey has provided logistical support to American troops in Iraq from Incirlik Air Base and has contributed military personnel to the American-led mission in Afghanistan. Washington has reciprocated by vocally supporting Turkey's bid for membership in the European Union and efforts to resolve the Cyprus conflict. The issue becomes complicated, however, when it comes to the war on terror. Outwardly, the two countries are committed partners in fighting terrorism of all kinds. But Turkey has been fighting with Kurdish separatists seeking independence since the 1980s. Since the invasion of Iraq, the U.S. military has been reluctant to act against the Kurdish Workers Party and has allowed it to operate in northern Iraq, which has distressed many in Turkey. Essentially, Washington tolerates a de facto Kurdish state in northern Iraq. "People think that the U.S. supports an independent Kurdish state in northern Iraq and therefore threatens the unity of Turkish land," said Nilufer Narli, a sociology professor at Bahcesehir University in Istanbul. Popular opinion of the United States and its allies, including Israel, seems to be steadily declining. Anti-American novels, including one that portrayed a war between the United States and Turkey, have been selling briskly; Hitler's "Mein Kampf" became a best seller last year. Narli believes that the perceived U.S. support for the Kurds is at the heart of this decline. Despite its popularity, however, "Valley of the Wolves - Iraq" neither triggered widespread anti-American violence in the country nor urged people to take to the streets to protest the war in Iraq. "It doesn't show anything that we did not already know," said Fahri Kaya, a 22-year-old security guard. "It was more like a group therapy that gave people a chance to let go of their negative feelings against what's been happening in Iraq as they shouted, clapped and cried." The U.S. ambassador to Turkey, Robert Wilson, in a televised interview on NTV last week, acknowledged that it was only a movie made for entertainment, but he said he still was not pleased with the way America was portrayed. He highlighted the good relations that the two countries have shared. Egemen Bagis, the former head of the Turkish American Businessmen's Association, agreed. "Our alliance with the U.S. has very strong roots," he said. "A movie or a book just cannot destroy it."
My first reaction to the clip was one of outrage in seeing Americans being portrayed in such a way. But, the Daily Show also offered up a mini montage of American movies where the roles are completely reversed. This caused me to pause and rethink my initial reaction. Was it fair of me to be so outraged when I have watched, and enjoyed, movies where the bad guys are Muslim terrorists. The more I thought about it, the more I had to agree that my initial feelings toward the movie were a bit unfair and biased. So instead I took the time to research the movie and to see what others might be thinking about the movie. I checked out IMDB's forum on the movie and read through the many posts. There is of course many varied reactions to the movie, and alot of debate going on (Not of all it pretty). I also read many news articles about the movie, and visited the movie's official site.
After alot of thought on the subject, my main feeling about the movie is one of concern. I worry that movie could possibly be throwing gasoline on the fire (the fire being the anti-American sentiment). I for one hate the war going on in Iraq, and worry for our men and women over there everyday. I would hate for anything to spark more violence in a situation that is already so volatile.
I'd love to hear what anyone else has to say on the subject, though I only ask that you keep an open mind. If it is your intention to simply lash out without giving any proper thought to subject, then please keep your opinions to yourselves. Otherwise, please feel free to leave comments on the subject. If you'd like to visit the movie's official web page the address is: http://www.valleyofthewolvesiraq.com/high/main.html
Must stop reading things that confuse me late at night.....
Alright so last night makes two nights in a row that I've read something that either confuses me/makes me think too much. Two nights ago, I stayed up late reading a story that involved time shifts-and only the main character and a few others knew what was going on. It made me think of the movie Dark City actually. Well no surprise my mind got way too sucked in, and when I'd stopped reading my mind was all of flutter with thoughts and feelings. So I course was up even later trying to calm my thoughts down.....Gah I hate it when you can't turn your mind off!
Last night I stayed up way too late reading synopsises (is that a word??) for the show Neon Evangelion Genesis. I saw one of the episodes on Adult Swim, and of course I was lost, so I got online to try and figure out what the heck was going on. I managed to read the complete synopsis for the entire show, but alas was left more confused than ever. So of course, once again, when I went to bed my mind wouldn't shut up, and I was left trying to fall asleep. I now know that my only hope concerning the show, is that I must find it and rent it....Or forever be left confused and wondering about what the heck the show is about. *sigh*
Sooo in closing this very random rant of mine....I just wanted to say that I have a hard enough time falling asleep at night. I must really stop reading things that only cause me to stay up later, lost in thought about what I just read. 2月15日 The Onion: America's Finest News SourceTelemarketers May Not Actually Care How You Are DoingCOLORADO SPRINGS, CO—Late in the afternoon, the warm, cheery sound of a ringing telephone fills the home of San Diego housewife Sandy Morris. "How are you doing?" asks the caller, her voice calm and friendly on the line. Pleased with the caller's good-natured, neighborly inquiry into her well-being, Morris warms to the conversation, and the two women quickly establish a rapport. Before the conversation ends, Morris has agreed to purchase a two-year membership in BudgeTravel USA, a discount-airfare club, for $129.95. Enlarge Image
According to a controversial new study, telemarketers may only be inquiring about your well-being to help their chances of making a sale. A typical suburban scene—or is it? According to a study released Monday by the Center For Marketing Ethics Research, a Colorado Springs consumer-advocacy group, telemarketers like the one Morris spoke to may not actually care how you are doing. "Asking how the customer is doing creates a 'personal touch' that makes it more difficult and awkward for the person being called to hang up—it's that simple," CMER director Rupert Wardley said. "These people are not, as their employers would have you believe, actually interested in how the weather is where you are, or how your day is going, or any of the other conversational niceties with which they pepper their remarks upon initiating a telephone relationship with a potential customer. No matter how nice they seem, the fact remains that to them, the whole conversation is nothing more than a job. And it's a job with only one end goal—to make the sale." http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29826 (Click for the full article)
2月14日 Happy Valentine's Day! Lending Out Books
Hal Sirowitz
You're always giving, my therapist said.
You have to learn to take. Whenever
You meet a woman, the first thing you do
is lend her your books. You think she'll
have to see you again in order to return them.
But what happens is, she doesn't have the time
to read them, & she's afraid if she sees you again
you'll expect her to talk about them, & will
want to lend her even more. So she
cancels the date. You end up losing
a lot of books. You should borrow hers.
The Changed Man
Robert Philips
If you were to hear me imitating Pavarotti
in the showr every morning, you would know
how much you have changed my life.
If you were to see me stride across the park,
waving to strangers, then you would know
I am a changed man--like Scrooge
awakened from his bad dreams feeling feather-
light, angel-happy, laughing the father
of a long line of bright laughs--
"It is still not too late to change my life!"
It is changed. Me, who felt short-changed
Because of you I no longer hate my body.
Because of you I buy new clothes.
Because of you I'm a warrior of joy.
Because of you and me. Drop by
this Saturday morning and discover me
fiercely pulling weeds gladly, dedicated
as a born-again gardener.
Drop by on Sundy--I'll Turtlewax
your sky-blue sports car, no sweat. I'll greet
enemies with a handshake, forgive debtors.
with a papal largesse. It's all because
of you. Because of you and me,
I've become one changed man.
 The Orange
Wendy Cope
At lunchtime I bought a huge orange--
The size of it made us all laugh.
I peeled it and shared it with Robert and Dave--
They got quarters and I had a half.
And that orange, it made me so happy,
As ordinary things often do
Just lately. The shopping. A walk in the park.
This is peace and contentment. It's new.
The rest of the day was quite easy.
I did all the jobs on my list
And enjoyed them and had some time over.
I love you. I'm glad I exist.
This Is Just To Say
William Carlos Williams
I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold
This Is Just To Say
Erica-Lynn Gambino
(For William Carlos Williams)
I have just
asked you to
get out of my
apartment
even though
you never
thought
I would
Forgive me
you were
driving
me insane.
The Best-and worse-of V-Day
By Matt Christensen
(Click the link to see the full article.)
Best:
Smart cookie “I didn’t have a girlfriend on Valentine’s Day last year. My mom knew that I’d just broken up with the woman I’d been dating, so she sent me a whole box full of her special chocolate chip cookies to make me feel better. It worked—in more ways than one. Not only were the cookies great, but I shared them with my neighbor next door. She was alone on Valentine’s Day too, and said she hadn’t had a home-baked cookie in a long time. She also said she was really glad I came to talk to her, because she’d noticed me around our street but didn’t have the nerve to talk to me. The next night, she and I went out to dinner, and ended up dating... I love those cookies.” -Mark, Westlake, OH Worst:
No reading between the lines necessary
“A few years ago, I’d been casually dating a guy for several months, and I was ready for a more serious relationship. Valentine's Day was coming, and I thought maybe the time was finally here. I really worked hard finding him a cool gift—a rare black-and-white picture of one of his favorite musicians. He got me a gift too, and a card. I opened the card and it said, ‘Happy Valentine’s Day—can we just be friends?’ I never found out what the gift was, because I promptly threw it at him and left.” -Alli, Philadelphia, PA  2月13日 Very Random Valentine's Day PostIn honor of Valentine's Day, here is a very random post about a few things associated with the day.
 Desire: (Taken from Vital Statistics By Paul Grobman)
 -- Percentage of male college students in a recent study who answered yes when an attractive female approached them and asked them to have sex: 75%
-- Percentage of female college students who answered yes when an attractive male asked them to have sex: 0%
--Percentage of woman older than 75 who say they "Would be quite happy to never have sex again": 36%
--Percentage of 75-year-old men who say the same: 5%
--Percentage of males who say they would be flattered if a coworker asked them to have sex: 66%
--Percentage of females who would be insulted if a coworker did the same: 66%
Diamonds:(Taken from Vital Statistics)
 -- Number of carats mined worldwide annually: 120 million
--Amount charged for these uncut diamonds by producers: $7 billion
--Value of these diamonds in finished jewelry: $58 billion
--Year the first diamond engagement ring was given: 1477 (Archduke Maximilian of Austria presented Mary of Burgundy with a gold band crowned with a piece of sparkling carbon. The ring was placed on the third finger of Mary's left hand, the finger that ancient Egyptians believed helf the vein of love, coursing directly to the heart.)
--Average size of an American diamond engagement ring: 0.8 carats
--Odds that an American Woman recieves a diamond engagement ring: 8 in 10
--Largest rough diamond ever found on Earth: 3,106 carats
(Called the Cullinan, the 3,106-carat hunk was discovered on Jan. 26, 1905 in the Premier mine of South Africa. It was cut into nine major diamonds and hundreds of smaller ones, including the Great Star of Africa--the largest cut diamond in existence at the 530.2 carats, now in the royal scepter of the British Crown Jewels.)
Candy: (Taken from Vital Statistics)
 --First heart-shaped box of chocolates: 1861
(Sometimes attributed to 1868, though there is no dispute that the first heart-shaped box of chocolate was made by Richard Cadbury, and featured a picture of his daughter holding a kitten.)
Kissing: (Taken from That Book of Perfectly Useless Information By Mitchell Symons)
 --A study by a Canadian anthropologist demonstrated that 97% of women shut their eyes during a kiss but only 37% of men did.
--Kissing on the lips is something the Romans started. A husband returning from work would kiss his wife's lips to see if she'd been drinking during the day. (Until the Romans invaded, the British had no word for kissing.)
--The French kiss itself, toungues and all, was invented in the Brittany village fo Pays de Mont as a substitute for sex because the population was growing too fast.
--In writing, particularly in greeting cards and in love letters, we us XXXXs to represent kisses. The origins of this go back to the days when people who couldn't write signed their name with an X. To emphasize their sincerity, they would then kiss their mark-in the same way that they would have kissed a Bible when swearing an oath on it. This practice of kissing the X led to the X's representing a kiss. The Romans also sealed the signing of contracts with a kiss.
--The Anti-Kissing League was formed in 1909 in America by people who considered kissing unhealthy.
--A really tongue-twisting kissing session exercises 39 different facial muscles and can burn up 150 calories-more tha a 15-minute swim. An ordinary peck uses up just 3 calories.
2月10日 Ok, so finally an actual postWow, so just when I thought things were calming down for me, and I could get back here on spaces, I got sick. I haven't been sick in a while, and so it seems that I got hit with hard. Luckily I seem to be getting better, though I'm still feeling a little icky. I'll try to get around to everyone's spaces within the next few days, so I can catch up on what you all have doing. (And also to visit any newcomers spaces.) Hope everyone is doing good and I'll talk to you laters! Unusually Stupid Americans By Kathryn Petras and Ross PetrasStupid Reactions
To Terrorism
In The USA
(Stupid Airline Passengers)
 "On the face of things, terrorism is surely not a humorous topic. With this we concur. But there have been some stupid things done as a result of terrorism which prove the unquenchable American spirit.....and the consequent ability to turn something serious into something somewhat....silly."
After 9/11, airport security tightened. One might assume (with logic) that fewer passengers would attempt to bring certain items on board a plane.
This would be an incorrect assumption.
15,982 pocketknives, 98 boxcutters, 6 guns, and 1 brick ("I don't know why he was carrying a brick," said a spokesman for the Transportation Security Administration.)
1,072 clubs or bats, 3,242 banned tools, 2,384 flammable items (including a welding gun in Boise, Idaho), 20,581 sharp objects (such as scissors, ice picks, and meat cleavers), and 1 toy cannon made of live ammunition)
In a "credit due where credit is due" spirit, let us also make note of those overzealous airport security screeners--who certainly are doing their darndest, gol'durnit, to keep us safe from a wide range of possible threats, including:
Suspicious Item: airline captain's personal pocketknife An airline captain had his pocketknife, which had a one-inch blade, confiscated at New York's La Guardia Airport before he boarded the Boeing 757 he was going to fly to Florida. Reason: He was told that, if he kept the knife, he might use it to gain control of an airplane.
Suspicious Item: vibrators (of the sexually stimulating sort) In February 2002, while in a plane on the runway in Dallas, 36-year-old Renee Koutsouradis was paged over the loudspeaker, asked to deplane and accompany a Delta Airlines security guard to the tarmac. There was "something suspicious" in her bag, something that appeared to be vibrating. She told the guard waht she thought it was but was still asked to remove the item and hold it up for inspection. The item: a battery-operated sex toy she and her husband had bought while vacationing in Las Vegas--which she had apparently not switched off. According to the lawsuit she later filed against Delta, passengers on the plane saw her holding the item and began laughing at her; the three male Delta employees "began laughing hysterically" and made "obnoxious and sexually harassing comments." She is seeking unspecified damages on a number of counts, including intentional infliction of public humiliation.
Suspicious Item: teeny-tiny G.I. Joe plastic toy guns Eager to stick to the letter of the law, airport security screeners have, regardless of size, seized toy guns, even though the guns in question are unlikely to be used in a hijack attempt. Two recent cases: Screeners at Los Angeles International Airport discovered a G.I. Joe doll in a British tourist's carry-on luggage and confiscated it....because the doll carried a two-inch rifle. Explained an LAX spokesman: "We have instructions to confiscate anything that looks like a weapon or a replica. If G.I. Joe was carrying a replica then it had to be taken from him." (Alert officials also asked if the doll came equipped with replica hand grenades, which they also wanted to confiscate.) Similarly, the screeners at the the Central Wisconsin Airport in Mosinee, Wisconsin, confiscated a G.I. Joe and the the larger four-inch rifle it carried.
Suspicious Item: breast milk Security guards a JFK International Airport in New York were suspicious about three bottles of milk that a woman was carrying (along with her infant daughter). The woman explained that it was breast milk for her daughter and offered to put a bit on her arm and lick it off to prove it wasn't a dangerous substance. But the guards said she had to drink from all three bottles or she would not be allowed on the plane. As the woman explained, they said that "there could be explosives in the baby bottles, and I could throw something at the stewardessses." She was considering a lawsuit a lawsuit, saying, "It was very uncomfortable and very embarrassing and very disgusting."
Suspicious Item: spray cologne A Saudi Arabian college student was was stopped at a security checkpoint at Philadelphia International Airport. His visa was fine, but security was worried about a container of liquid in his luggage. The student sprayed himself with the liquid, trying to show that it was merely cologne...but accidently also sprayed two security guards. A code-red hazardous-materials alert was issued, and local police, firefigters, and the FBI rushed to the scene. The guards were sent to a hospital for testing, and the emergency room was quarantined for three hours. A doughnut shop and a Rite Aid drugstore were also closed for forty-five minutes, after it was learned that two police officers had been to both after having come in contact with the "substance" when examining the bottle. The quarantines and the alert were lifted when the "unknown substance" was determined to be, indeed, cologne.
Suspicious Item: refillable lighters (but not disposable lighters) On Christmas Day in the San Francisco Airport, a man was stopped at the security station. He had two cigarette lighters: a disposable Bic lighter and a refillable butane lighter that had been a gift from his wife. The security supervisor explained to him that the refillable lighter was not permitted. The Bic, however, was fine. After being told he had two choices--mailing the lighter to himself or having it confiscated, the man went outside and kept lighting the lighter until it was out of butane. He went back in line and again was told he couldn't bring the lighter, even empty, on the plane. He could, however, still bring the disposable lighter. The following day, he reached the chief of security, who explained that the lighter shouldn't have been confiscated and said he would try to get it back for him. The man described the lighter: brushed aluminum with a Mirage Casino logo. A few days later, he recieved a package in the mail containing a refillable butane lighter with a Mirage Casino logo....but it was black and gold.
Suspicious Item: mousetraps Tampa airport screeners spotted a "very, very suspicious" object on their baggage-screening monitors and had a section of the airport evacuated for about forty-five minutes. A bomb squad was called in to remove the object form the suitcase. It was a moustrap inside a coffee can. 1月30日 Tomorrow's Just A Day AwayOkay folks. For those few of you out there who took the time to visit my little space, Thank you.
I plan to start posting again tomorrow, and to start visiting spaces again. Life seems to of calmed down a bit for me, so hopefully I'll be able to spend some more time on here again.
That said, hope to talk to you guys soon, and I'll try to post something tomorrow! Until then, here's a little something I found that will hopefully give you a bit of a laugh.
 1月2日 Comical Essay
The Birds And The Bees
By Ellen Degeneres
Hardly a day goes by when somebody doesn't ask me, "Ellen, how can I explain sex to my children?" Unfortunately, it's always the same person who is asking me that question He's the man who runs the cheese shop I go to--Cheeses 'N' Things it's called(I've always been afraid to ask what the 'N' Things are). Anyway, this man's only child works in the store with him, is in his mid-twenties, and from the way he handles a sharp chedder, can probably explain more about sex to father than vice versa.
Whatever the case, I'm sure there are many other reasonably same people who are troubled by this problem. And the more childeren there are (and I'm not sure where these children are coming from), the more explaining about sex there is to be done.
By sex I mean, of course...sex. You know what I'm saying. There are many different types of sex, but for the purpose of this explanation I'm just talking about...you know, sex. In other words, you might have two consenting adults, a coconut, a pound of confetti, and very thristy yak. What they do may be very beautiful and spiritual and fulfilling, but it's not necessarily something you'd care to explain to a child. Okay, I think we've defined our terms, so let's get on with the explanation.
Ok then, what you've got to do is just explain sex simply and to the point. You just say, "When you get older you're going to meet somebody that you really, really, really like. Well, if you're lucky you're going to like that person. Maybe you don't even like 'em a lot, but at least they don't bug you too much. Or, okay, it's, let's say, closing time at the bar--it's really late and you've been knocking down quite a few Rusty Nails. And you know how the lighting is at those bars. I mean, everybody looks good. But then the next morning you look at the person next to you, and you're like, "Argghhhh! Help me!"
Maybe it's better to be a bit more allegorical. Tell a little story. You could say there's a Papa Bear and a Mama Bear. And the Mama Bear says, "Where is that Papa Bear? He hasn't been home in a long time. He says he's working late at he pretzel factory, but I don't believe that lying grizzly bastard." So she hires another bear to follow the Papa Bear--a Detective Bear (or, if you prefer, a detective goat--don't be afraid to add your own spin to the story).
Well, the Detective Bear shadows the Papa Bear for a week. Then he tells the Mama Bear that every night, after work, Papa Bear goes to the same hotel room in the Poconos. Well, Mama Bear decideds that she's going to give Papa Bear a big surprise. So, she goes to the hotel, kicks down the door, and there in the heart-shaped tub, sipping champagne, as naked as the day they were born are...No, this isn't a good way either.
There is a big fat queen bee, and she likes her honey. So, she's in her hive and all these male bees are just buzzing around saying "Oooo baby, I feel lucky tonight."
Or you take a big tub of butter, some milk, two or three eggs, a dash of vanilla...No, I'm sory, that's not sex, that's my recipe for French toast. At least I hope that's not sex.
You know, I think the best idea is just to let the child watch cable TV. Or go out and rent 9 1/2 Weeks. When I was in school, they showed us a sex education film about a boy calling up a girl on the phone and asking her out on a date. Nowadays, I'm sure they show 9 1/2 Weeks or something starring Sharon Stone.
So, in conclusion, that's how I would talk to a child about sex. I sincerely hope that I've been of help. Excuse me, but I've got to go for a short walk. All of sudden it has gotten very hot in here, and I've developed a craving for French toast.
End of a year and resolutions
Well New Years has come and gone. The parties and celebrations are over, and it's time to go back to our proper lives. Personally, I'm pretty happy to see 2005 go. It wasn't the best year in my life, it was actually one of the hardest, and darkest, years of my life.
I found myself in the emergency room for the second time in a few months for cutting up one my wrists. Though, thankfully, this trip didn't land me in the psych ward again. I lost three close friends of mine, who all cut me out their lives for reasons I won't go into. A time when I needed friends the most I found myself alone, drowning in a sea of dispair and my life slipping away from me. I then was checked into a long term hospital at the beginning of April. I found myself far away from home, and desolate at the fact that I was in a "mental institute". After almost four long months it was time for me to leave the hospital, though I found myself wishing I could stay. I'd found a place where people understood what I was going through, and where I wasn't judge because I had a few "screws loose." I found myself on the road home, missing the place that had been safe haven, and unsure of the future. Actually being home was nothing like I imagined it would be. I again was pretty much friendless, and trying to adjust to being back in the real world. That adjusting has taken many months, and I still don't feel like I'm quite there yet. I also haven't been able to get a job because of my damn anxiety, and am still batteling my depression.
So, now it's a new year, and I can only hope that I can makes things better this year. Though I admit, I still feel so lost, powerless, and alone. So many demons are still clanging around in my head, tearing me in so many directions. It's hard to hope for a better future sometimes when your so lost in the fog, with no idea which direction to go. I suppose all I can really do is put my best foot forward, take a few risks, and try my best. So in the spirit of this, I've decided to actually make a few New Years Resolutions. I haven't actually done this in a long time so here goes:
1. Actually make an effort to excercise this year. 2. Make an actual attempt to quit smoking. 3. Start looking for reasons to like me for me, and not who I think I should be. 4. Actually work on believing those reasons. 5. Learn something new. 6. Work on my control issues (ie. not pushing people away before they have a chance to hurt me.) 7. Try to learn that I am more than my illness. 8. Remember to laugh.
Well there you have it. Good luck all those who made new year's resolutions, take care, and I'll talk to you all later.
12月29日 New Years and Life I've been having a bit of rough time lately so I might not be on spaces for a while. Hope you have a safe and fun New Years!!
Love,
Ambie
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I mean, is it seriously so hard to just put something back where it belongs. I don't know how many items we had to return to their proper places. It's simple really people: Just put the item back where it belongs, don't just throw it anywhere!! Someone does have to pick up after you....On saturday we were there till after one in the morning just putting retail back in it's proper place. 
I mean honestly now, who gives the new kid on the block one the craziest sections to take care anyways!! The entire section was sooo trashed and I couldn't keep up with straightening things up, and putting back all of the merchandise that was moved around. Not wanting to be the one who kept everyone else there later, I was really wigging by the time the store closed. 
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